Not a delusion!

In the morning

Bismillāhirrahmānirrahīm...

Gaza, how are you there?

I write this while gazing at the ocean, standing silently, imagining you there, staring at the sea, waiting, hoping for a fleet of ships to bring you aid. Yet all I see is the vast expanse, just as you see there: endless waters. Nothing. Only sky. Clouds. Waves. And memories of you. I recall the words of one of your people asking the world: Until when?

Gaza, until when?

Gaza, until when?

Gaza, until when must you endure all this agony?

Even our Beloved Izz El Din Al Qassam Brigades, Abu Ubaida, in his latest speech, has declared that the leaders, elites, and Islamic scholars are the true adversaries before ALLAH Almighty. And that is what we, ordinary people, feel. We care so deeply, yet our power is so limited. But those with power, they worship the colonizing criminals. They are the barriers to your freedom. They are the servants of butchers.

The ache woven through his words still echoes, becoming a suffocating weight, turning into tears within the heart.

Gaza, until when will dr. Hussam be tortured?

How can billions of humans fail to free one dr. Hussam?

What is truly happening? Why do the elites of Arab and Muslim nations not care? They possess every means to help you, Gaza.

Why do they love wealth, positions, power, and material things so fiercely? What happiness do they truly seek? And why must they steal your lives to grasp it?

Why do they worship cowards in diapers? Why have they no dignity? Or what is dignity to such servants of criminals?

What can I do, Gaza? I receive devastating news about you. You who have endured for nearly two years are now so frail, your bodies can no longer bear the crushing weight of starvation. Your people collapse on streets under this monstrous famine. I wish to be like an Arctic tern, flying with food for you, Gaza, carrying all I can with grit, hauling it to you. I wonder how those birds endure their pole-to-pole journeys, how they fight off predators, so that when I fly to you, the criminals cannot kill me or seize the sustenance I bring. I know I’m dreaming. But those leaders and elites CAN do what for us is just a dream. They have everything to save you, Gaza. But they don’t!

I know of airdrops. But they only wound you, maim you, even kill you. I want to deliver aid properly, nobly, with my own body, my own grit, across the distance between my land and yours. Your neighbors on thrones could do this without dreaming, Gaza, yet they do nothing. Instead, they block all aid to you. Their service goes only to criminals; they prove loyalty to their criminal masters in word and deed. They become the Iron Dome. They become donors. They become military bases. They become razor-sharp stones. They do it all for their criminal lords.

In the afternoon

Gaza, I truly question our RABB about you: Until when must you suffer so? My heart feels shredded hearing stories from your people newly freed from the criminals’ prisons. I am shattered by your people’s pain. They scream in agony under boundless torment, and no one there to save them, to protect them, except fellow prisoners. They scream alone behind bars. Tortured with cruelty so vile... I cannot describe such monstrous suffering.

Until when will you endure this?

Until when will criminals act as they please, torturing you with utmost sadism, unpunished?

Until when will these colonizers enjoy impunity?

How do we help you, Gaza?

How do we avenge you against them?

When will aid come to free you all from this hell?

Until when must we who love you deeply watch you bleed?

Today I asked our RABB,

amidst my woundedness seeing you wounded,

amidst the world’s vile conspiracy that makes helping you so impossible, Gaza,

even when hundreds of millions of good-hearted souls long to.

Hard. Agonizing.

I didn’t know who to ask.

So I asked the Creator of the universe,

the Guardian LORD of the worlds...

I didn’t know where to place hope for lifting your suffering.

So I questioned our RABB:

Where is HE when HIS believing servants scream in pain?

What does HE do when HIS servants are tortured with unspeakable cruelty?

When so many of your people are abused in prisons, in detention camps?

I keep wondering,

because each of your people isn’t tortured just once,

but every moment.

They suffer constantly, alone,

shattered alone, bodies crushed, drenched in blood, screaming in agony,

in their solitude.

And you are so good.

While those colonizer criminals and their servants are so evil.

You are tortured viciously,

while those scum of Jahannam roam healthy and unharmed.

It bewilders me.

Especially when most who defend you are also tortured especially in the West.

Those who do good are tormented; those who do evil walk free.

I’m confused.

Where is our RABB in these moments of agony?

Why must you hurt this much?

What does our RABB do in these hours of despair?

Not that I doubt HIM,

but what happens to you shakes the soul, wounds the spirit. I can no understand this. But i know for sure, this is a trial. This is about my Faith. And my struggle to understand this is part of worshipping ALLAH. It doesn't mean i don't have faith.

It just hurts so bad that no one punishes those hell-bound monsters. This hurts so bad that a conspiracy of a group of stupid, cowardly people can suppress our efforts to help our loved ones so much in Gaza, in Palestine.

It hurts me if their punishment is postponed till Judgment Day.

Because, I want them tortured now and in the Hereafter,

for their evil knows no bounds.

You are wounded, Gaza, yet no one punishes your tormentors, not with the cruel, comprehensive punishment they deserve.

Those criminals, elites, servants, useless slaves, they roam free.

Those vile beings move about, enjoying life,

while you drown in unending pain.

So stark. So bitter.

My mind aches from this reality.

How do I understand this?

How do I comprehend this destiny of boundless suffering?

Who else to ask but the All-Caring?

Only ALLAH Subḥānahu wa Ta’ālā holds the answer,

for He is the Truly Caring, the Knower of life’s mysteries...

In the evening

I don’t know.

My heart is shattered by your pain.

I weep endlessly, raging at those depraved criminals.

Watching you tortured daily, it crushes me. One way I cope is crying. But, I fell asleep in tears, with my fist sore from pounding the floor to release this fury. I slept briefly. Then...

The Recitation of Qur’anic verses slipped into my ears, waking me.

In a quiet afternoon, sky blue, thin white clouds scattered,

no sound but that Sacred Recitation,

drifting from a distant mosque radio,

yet clear, unbearably beautiful.

I listened with a sobbing heart.

My soul grieved deeply...

and ALLAH Subḥānahu wa Ta’ālā spoke to me,

answering what I sought:

"Had WE sent down this Qur’an upon a mountain, you would have seen it crumble in humility before ALLAH. Such are the parables WE set forth for people, that they may reflect." (Surah Al-Ḥashr: 21)

Gaza, I swear mountains would crumble in terror of disobeying HIM.

Yet those Jahannam criminals, those elites, those servants,

mere specks compared to mountains, dare defy ALLAH Subḥānahu wa Ta’ālā with such arrogance.

Unfathomably evil.

They torture you savagely,

especially your imprisoned people,

hidden far from sight,

torturing them endlessly as a hobby.

Vile. Odious.

They think no one can punish them.

They drown in their impunity-privilege.

My heart bleeds, no one cruelly punishes them.

I wept on, listening to our RABB’s reply...

"HE is ALLAH, there is no God but HIM.

The Most Compassionate (Ar-Raḥmān),

The Most Merciful (Ar-Raḥīm)." [Surah Al-Ḥashr: 22]

HE whose love and care none can equal.

This is HIS answer to my cry:

Where is HE when you’re tortured?

My heart sobbed violently.

O Rabb... 🤲🤲 T_T

What does our RABB do while you’re tortured?

How does HE comfort you? Strengthen you?

I ache seeing your suffering, Gaza,

your people’s agony across occupied Palestine,

across the earth where innocents endure

physical and psychological torture,

while perpetrators roam unpunished.

How does the Love and Care of our RABB embrace your wounds?

How do you endure such brutality daily?

What thoughts keep your hearts unbroken? T_T

"HE is Allāh, there is no God but HIM,

The Sovereign (Al-Malik),

The Most Pure (Al-Quddūs),

The Source of Perfection, the Source of Peace (As-Salām),

The Bestower of Faith and Security (Al-Mu’min),

The Ever-Watchful Guardian (Al-Muhaymin),

The Almighty (Al-‘Azīz),

The Compeller, The Restorer (Al-Jabbār),

The Majestic (Al-Mutakabbir)"

[Surah Al-Ḥashr: 23]

Gaza,

Is this how our RABB sustains you?

As Al-Malik (The Sovereign),

whispering calm into your hearts

amidst unbearable screams of pain?

As Al-Mu’min (The Granter of True Faith and Security),

reassuring you, wrapping you in safety

so despair doesn’t consume you?

As Al-Jabbār (The Restorer),

mending your brokenness,

lifting you up even when your bodies are crushed?

Is HE greater than all this grief?

Will you endure?

But... when will you be free? T_T

"Glory be to ALLAH above what they associate!" [Surah Al-Ḥashr: 23]

Our RABB never teaches evil, let alone commands it.

Yet those who harm you,

many claim to be Muslims.

So many of them.

They don’t bring you food, water, medicine.

They don’t free your tortured prisoners,

though they easily could, Gaza.

Instead, those servants of colonizer criminals

scurry about conspiring with their masters,

plotting crime after crime,

hiding behind the name of Islām,

deceiving the world, scattering our attention.

My heart bleeds watching them serve their criminal lords.

How can anyone claiming faith betray so vilely?

May ALLAH Subḥānahu wa Ta’ālā destroy them and their criminals.

May ALLAH Subhaanahu Wa Ta'ala annihilate them from within.

May those traitors and criminals tear each other apart.

They are the real enemies.

May Allāh obliterate them soon,

and avenge you, Gaza, Palestine,

with devastating, crushing retribution,

in this world and the next.

May ALLAH strip them of power,

and raise instead the truly righteous,

the best of HIS servants,

so no people suffer like this again... 🤲 T_T

"HE is Allāh, the Creator (Al-Khāliq),

The Originator (Al-Bāri’),

The Fashioner of Forms (Al-Muṣawwir).

To HIM belong the Most Beautiful Names."

[Surah Al-Ḥashr: 24]

Ya RABB! Ya Wahhāb (The Bestower),

Ya Fattāḥ (The Opener),

free Palestine.

Free all her people from colonial prisons,

from detention camps.

Restore them. Protect them.

Never again let Your noble believing people be tortured. 🤲🤲 T_T

Let those criminals offer no excuses.

Let their betrayals end.

Let their power crumble.

Destroy them from every side, RABB.

No more torture from sky, sea, or land.

Lift the siege on Gaza.

Free Gaza, Ya Wahhāb!

Ya Fattāḥ! Ya Khayr ur-Rāziqīn (Best of Providers)!

Ya Raḥmān, Raḥīm, free Palestine.

Free Your noble believing people from boundless suffering.

Ya ALLAH, Ya Karīm (Most Generous)!

Ya Mu’izz (Honorer)! Ya Samī’ (All-Hearing)! Ya Baṣīr (All-Seeing)!

O You whom we worship!

O You whom we seek!

O You whom our hearts yearn for,

help us. Help Gaza.

Help the noble people of Palestine... 🤲🤲 T_T

"All that is in the heavens and earth glorifies HIM.

And HE is the Almighty (Al-‘Azīz),

the All-Wise (Al-Ḥakīm).” (Surah Al-Ḥashr: 24)

Ya RABB,

You never command evil.

You are the Source of all good.

You are the Almighty.

You are All-Wise.

Ya RABB, end the suffering of Palestine’s people.

Aid their protectors, their resisters.

Grant them glorious victory at negotiation tables,

and majestic triumph on battlefields.

Destroy those servants of criminals, RABB.

Annihilate them all.

Help us, Rabb.. 🤲🤲 T_T

O You Who places hope in hearts... 🤲🤲 T_T

O Only One with true power over all existence... 🤲🤲 T_T

O You Who designed this universe in perfection and beauty... 🤲🤲 T_T

Rabb, Yours are the Most Beautiful Names...

Ya Wahhāb... Ya Fattāḥ...

Anta Fa’ālun limā Turīd...

(You do what You will)... 🤲🤲 T_T

O Reliever of all sorrows... relieve Gaza, Palestine, and her people.. 🤲🤲 T_T

We seek refuge in You from helplessness. Bring Your aid closer than a vein.. 🤲🤲 T_T